I, Steph, finally won a give away hosted by Alissa and feel like a total bad ass as a result. However, I lost another contest, an "ugly photo" contest, held by Mel. I guess I should be honored my photo wasn't the worst, but I'm not and to be honest, the winner is much more deserving. I love her ugly mug! -Shout out to the Pro-Steph Voters *WOOT WOOT* :)
Got a totally rad (and silly) manicure. I typically get phony nails or a French manicure, but not this time around! I got Easter/Birthday nails:
Had a birthday April 5th, but kind of celebrated on the 3rd @ Pete's Piano in Addison. I complained all last week about having to share the spotlight with Jesus since Easter Sunday fell during Birthday Weekend '10. I can only hope God has a sense of humor.
Was pulled over by the police for the 2nd time in my 28.99 years while on my way to my university to make a major purchase. Thank you Hurst police for adding to my stress....it's not like I can see my tail light; after all it is behind me. Anyway, my cap and gown has been purchased for graduation and my body is about to shut down in a few weeks. *Graduating Magna Cum Laude bitches* Oh, speaking of bitches I would've been Summa Cum Laude had I not missed one, single, solitary day of class, which lowered my overall grade in that class to a B.
Haven't been on any dates. Yes, my serial dating has come to an end; at least for now. I don't know when or if it's going to pick up again. Gosh, did I really just lose some readers!? I know this is crazy, but I'm still hanging out with DLC. I even ditched the one I was going to hold in my dating queue. Nuts, right?
Just days away from taking the last test before I can apply to The State Board of Education for teacher certification. I'm a gosh darn wreck, y'all!
Enjoy this short vid-The first stage strutter is a 67 year old lady also celebrating her birth @ Pete's Piano. They paid $100.00 to hear Pussy Control.
A continuation of yesterday's post. You know, the one about my giant granny panty show and breast revelation. I don't know if I'll ever be able to laugh that catastrophe off. Ugh...
Before things went sour Friday night I was naturally in good spirits. Spirits which elevated when I saw my favorite club go-er!
There's a guy, whose name I don't know, and he's a very serious, dedication patron and dancer at a Ft. Worth establishment. No, he isn't an employee, just loyal I guess.
Anyway, I've mentioned him before, but on other blog, the old one. Crap! I'd link the post if I could...I keep Breathing Up The Oxygen private :/ If you've been following and made the transition over here to NTO, then you may remember the night I was followed by a weird-o with a paper rose and approached by an older gentleman?
So, this guy whose name I don't know has clearly choreographed moves and I caught some on vid this time around. Yes, he's still going strong months later!
I'm really hating the way this post is going, but enjoy!
Let me get you up to speed…A whole lot has happened and not happened in the last six days:
Went on dates with 2 new guys (Date Guy number one, let’s call him DLC, as in doesn’t like candy. WTF, right? And, I’ll call the Date Guy number 2 Urban Cowboy, not to be confused with my previously mentioned favorite mistake, P.C)
Experienced a freak snow storm after a 75 degree day
Spring Break ended
Went back to work
Haven’t consistently slept in my bed
I realize this is a lot for one post, no worries; I’ll keep you abreast of only critical points.
Friday, was an awesomely warm spring day of about 75 degrees, and there was a date lined up with DLC. We met, I ate, and we both had 1 Coke and 1 alcohol drink. Two lame asses in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G.
Somehow I ended up going to his house Saturday morning to watch movies. *I always say never agree to “watch a movie” because ultimately it means he wants to see your vagina* He seemed to be on the up and up, so like I said, I went and F.Y.I., there was no vagina watching.
Saturday evening, I met U.C. at Starbucks for coffee. This is when the freak snow storm began. Good God, he’s gorgeous and kind! I’ve decided to keep him in my queue. Is that bad?
Okay, here’s where things get weird.
Sunday, I went back to DLC’s house and spent the night and, no there wasn’t any “movie watching” going on you perverts. I’ve become a serial dater, not hooker. I spent Tuesday and Wednesday night at his house, as well.
Summing up the situation, FacebookMsging with a friend not really named Roger: 19:53Stephanie theres a weird sort of connection its terrifying and quick and seems so natural and unnatural at the same time i cant work it out in my mind
19:53 Roger step back and get a little clinical, k
I wholly agree with the friend. Things are excellent, but incredibly too fast. I definitely don't want to jump into anything even though I sort of have by spending so much time with DLC. He's cute, nerdy, tells horribly long jokes and so, so nice. I feel like myself around him.
Things are so much easier when the men are jerks!
Enough. Take a mental vacation and enjoy this video because I haven't any good pics to offer. I'm posting this vid not only because I thoroughly enjoy this song, which is stuck on repeat in my head, but for a bloggy friend :) -okay!
If you’re a fan of my blog on Facebook then you already have a general idea of what’s going down in StephLand regarding the date and the mid-week holiday.
A second date has yet to pan out with the most recent Tuesday night guy. I appreciate all the crossing y’all did, but clearly you didn’t cross good enough.
No, I shouldn’t be ugly to you, friends. Y’all are great, great people who really know what’s up. Again, thanks for your help. It’s not you’re fault this guy sucks at making smart decisions.
I always say, "Never trust a guy in white sneakers", but I must also add "Never trust a guy with a faux hawk" to my list as well. Seriously, ladies!
Wednesday night, St. Pat’s Day, I went to a local bar, however not the local bar intended because they were charging cover and babes are broke these days.
St. Pat, St. Pat, you aren’t much of a Saint...You made me stay up late boozing, which resulted in a case of bubble guts in the morning. That was so not nice! You also sought out a handful of semi-English speaking men to follow my friends and me around the bar, totally messing up what little game I do have. Wait, I don’t like bar men. Either way, the game was screwed thanks to these guys.
Had fun though!
Ok, one last thing. I had, had, had to add this youtube video. I'm such a child.
My social calendar took a plunge when I moved home with Mom. No, not because everyone suddenly decided I’m a major lame ass and loser for living at home, several factors fell into play keeping me home; the comforts of Mom, sickness, laziness, sleepiness and work. Last night was a different story; there was finally a good dose of partying it up with friends in a surprise celebration for The N’s 30th birthday!
We met at the infamous Rainbow Lounge in Ft. Worth, a local bar catering to the gays. The N got to be center of attention on the dance floor, as she received multiple lap dances from females and males alike. All sorts of vag and penis in the face, pants unfastened with teeth, spinning, gyrating, vibrating, dry humping, basically the whole kit and caboodle. Lucky! I made a video with my cam and it’s pretty bad, but if you turn off your sound and be patient, you can see what I’m talking about:
Now, let’s get down to biznas… Having shared what I dancing fool I am a dance video has been requested multiple times. Well friends, I’ve finally come through. In this vid, I’m standing around a cluster of friends who can’t seem to make it to the dance floor. BOO! on you party poopers! Again, not the greatest of videos, but here’s a tiny glimpse of the terribleness.
Me & The Birthday Babe
God only knows what this is about.
Some fancy, slick moves.
"I have no control over me belt or my leg!", was what I was yelling after I probably made some little fella uncomfortable. I later apologized for being so fresh, but I wouldn't have gotten so fresh if he wasn't looking as uncomfortable as he did. I refuse to take full responsibility for my actions.
I'm like a little devil on his shoulder...Def looking mischievous
This is the whole pants being undone. Thank goodness The N was wearing underpants!
Woot Woot!
I have a thing for puny gays. We made some friendlies.
The lot.
Yeah, nonsmoking Steph was puffing the cigs. Ugh, did I feel like a giant heap of shit this morning when I woke up! At least it wasn't crack or something...Hopefully tonight will be equally as fun & I wish you all a good weekend, too!
Don't forget I'm taking love horrors...vlogs, poems, artwork, stories or whatever you got to give! Viva La Valentine :) send to nottheoxygen@gmail.com
To answer a question unanimously asked, yes, things really are as bleak as they appear. Clearly there hasn’t been any sort of substantial connection, this is all honesty; copied and pasted for your delight.
Now granted, there have been a few slight sparks I saved for myself and calling them sparks is by far a stretch, but I was holding out hope :/ Gosh, what’s smaller than a spark? Perhaps I can refer to these smaller than sparks as random pieces of flint happening into my lap without a piece of steel to get things sparking? Oh, for the love of science and survival skill!
So yeah, there was a date and again, this whole date thing is a stretch. The sap was late and had the nerve to show up with a friend. I had just finished quickly gulping a pineapple drink, signed my drink receipt and was about to hit the pavement when this lad shows up. (and, Lad is what I shall refer to him as since he reminded of just that, a boy)
*Side note: Remember Barf Boy wanted me to meet up with him and his friend? Is this some sort of trend I’m unfamiliar with? Aren’t we adults? Can adults not meet and hang out without a friend in tow? I hate dating and the very idea of it! To my surprise, bringing the friend along was a great idea considering the friend was full of spunk and conversation, just like I like. On the other hand, friend is married and yuck on that!
Lad, although easy on the eyes, fell flat on the ears since he wasn’t much of a talker. He repeatedly told me I was much hotter than he imagined and 10 times skinnier. These two statements were on repeat.Yes, I'm cute and yes, I'm on the smaller side...I think most women want to hear this, but when it's all you ever hear it's not much of a compliment. I’d like to think I have the teeniest of tiniest bit of substance worth some sort of acknowledgement. Ugh. All in all, I don't see this going anywhere worth mentioning.
Serious, guys, I'm beginning to think the 2nd site I signed up for is some sort of sex site. This evening, I got yet another request for some boo-tay from another picture -less, married, forty year old.
I don't have the patience to ride this one out. Between the outright weirdos and wife cheating sex fiends, I just don't have it in me. LOL Must be slim pickin's during the holiday season- that's what I'm going to tell myself- Remember, keeping the faith?
Okay, so instead of posting another married dude's pathetic quest for poon, you can read this little gem that came my way this afternoon:
In short, I was just strolling throughBLAHBLAHBLAHbasically minding my own business, when i slipped on those stairs - tumbled down, i grabbed a tablecloth for some reason pulling hummus and tortilla soup down upon me.. I looked up from my embarrassing position, wiping soup from my eyes - and there was this smiling profile picture looking back at me. Above the picture it said: ohmysteph. And I thought to myself - wow this is fortunate, this young lady seems awesome... But what should i write to her...My name is ********.How are you today?
After a smidge of self reflection, Mr. Rico Suave recanted his statement in another message sent roughly 3 hours later:
dangit that sounded kinda lame-o huh?I try and invent these literary non-sequitors when i really want to grab a gal's attention. A good strategy perhaps - but high probability to fall flat.. When I went back and reread this one in particular i'm not liking the way it sits on the ears... Anyhow..
I'm calling it quits for a while. I know I'm getting worn out....don't wanna bore y'all to death with my sad bunch of unsuitable suitors.
I detest winter, holidays are the pits, I'm a kind of a Scrooge & don't care. However, enthusiam of 6 and 7 year olds soften you a bit. This is a cute little poem the kids recite in class. It cracks me up!
BTW
I found this image from The Snowy Day on a random blog. If you've got a a minute, check it out here! Somebody made a short 2 minute movie of the story & it's really sweet.
I saw this bubble (Tues.) & immediately realized these should be my words. I'm such the subconscious sabotage-er!
And then, I saw this quote (Wed.) after a water cooler discussion:
"I got involved with someone I never expected to get involved with, and it was that kind of awakening...I never fought it because it was like, 'Oh, I understand why I had the issues I had early in life.' I had a great deal of difficulty connecting with men in relationships." -Meredith Baxter
Meredith caused me to really question my sexuality. I wondered if I'm repressing some hidden desire, depriving myself of hot lesbo action. I never had the opportunity to kiss a girl and like it.Thus, time was spent staring off into space imaging things women to do one another in a sexual situation, and well, there's no rush to change teams.
Yeah, I've had a tendency to sabotage...
P.S.
I loved Family Ties as a child and as an adult. You, too, can watch full episodes @ http://www.cbs.com/classics/family_ties/ **Thank you Lord, Jesus! Viva La Family Ties!**
I grew up in a slowly, painfully dying small mid-western village that was propserous way before my time. By my early early teens, I was forced south to the great, hot state of Texas and the rest is history. Now, I'm dying to get out of this overgrown, small town minded, big city suburb they call "FUN CENTRAL" because it lacks fun and public transportation.
